How to get the best out of this blog...

All blogs post are more recent first, if you want to read about Ellie's Journey I'd suggest starting from the first post back in September 2011 (October Posts) and read on Chronologically from there. It will make more sense and you'll get to meet the little girl who gave my life purpose.
Thank You for reading - every new reader shows that she has met another person and in her short life made such an impact. x

Wednesday, 2 March 2011

Sunday 27th February -big changes

Everyone may have been wondering why no posts. Mummy can't type well when she is tired. So what did Saturday night and Sunday look like? Full of coughing and yawning and overall worry and change.
Mummy became concerned that my cough still wasn't leaving. Eventually lovely Dr Ellison arrived to start making decisions about how to help me. As Chloral wasn't working the next action to suppress my cough was morphine this is a really scary drug that when mentioned made Mummy's legs go wobbly, as if she wasn't tired enough. It was her turn to sleep in the flat but wouldn't leave. Daddy and she just stroked my head and soothed me with words because there was nothing else to do. And they cried, because this was the start of a sad day one of many more sad days in a big fat row of sad days and weeks and months.

Sharon kept a constant vigil over me when as soon as an infusion drip was inserted gets this, big word coming, subcutaneously, Pumping, ever so tiny amounts of morphine to help make my cough stop. I had another X-ray that showed that my chest was still not clear, bit here I was stuck with this persistent irritating and downright rude houseguest if I'm honest. It's sore and stingy and makes me hot and sweaty and miserable and rotten. Poor mummy and Daddy they can't really do anything more

Now and they just had to stand there and watch me cough and cough until I was hoarse. Eventually I slept, mummy slept all rumpled on the bed and Daddy slept in a heap squished in the chair for about four hours. And then I coughed again and again, Dr Ellison skipped breakfast, well she must have done as she was here early to see me. My IV was changed and I had morphine injected in my leg and eventually I fell asleep again. 
The next frightening thing was that my probe came off my foot and my monitors were all switched off, I am now flying solo. Daddy and Mummy then spent the day sharing me for cuddles on their laps only changing when they needed to get up for a wee. Mummy read me stories about Plop the owl who was afraid of the dark and brushed my hair. Daddy told me secrets and whispered in my ear and they emptied boxes of small soft tissues.Becky left for the day and was sad. She really didn't know if she would see me again. I felt hot but was pale and my breathing very erratic, but had another morphine injection and I slept through until 5am on Mummy's lap. And she just held me and kissed me and snuggled me close. Suze sat with us; Daddy laid awake watching us and reaching out to stroke my hand. There is a real bed here now so we can cuddle if we want to.


  1. Sweet little Ellie, always thinking of you and your very brave Mummy and Daddy, sleep tight xxxx

  2. Stay strong. Thinking of you all. xx

  3. Lots of love and hugs from Sheffield as ever xxx

  4. Always thinking of you, stay strong. Lots of love Lucas' Nanna xxx

  5. :( Bless you sweet girl!

  6. sending so much love and prayers x
    I know we've never met but we love you very much little miss Ellie x Millie sends you a huge big cuddle x stay strong xxx

  7. May God watch over you all.

    Lots of Love.

    Jax and Ki. Xxxx